I don't know why I'm even here.

But, writing takes away the remorse I feel.

The things you do in the past always come back to haunt you.
Despite how much you've changed, how much you've grown or how much you've learnt.
It'll always creep up when you least expect it.

I, for one, can say that I experienced this first hand.
And, probably, until the day I die.

But I guess that's just a reminder as to how vital decision making is in our lives, every single day.
The smallest of things can actually become the biggest of problems.

And everything seems to revolve around trust.
I realized today too, that, trust, to trust someone, whoever it may be, be it, family, your closest friends, your boyfriend, is the hardest thing to be completely sure of.
How can you really know that the secrets you share with to people, even the ones who you're closest to, will keep it entirely to themselves?
You can't.

Slips of the tongue happen.
But, can you really be furious at him or her?
I guess that, we really are all human, just human, at the end of the day.
Beings who will constantly tumble and fumble. It could've been you who did wrong, who accidentally spilled the beans about something you were supposed to keep to yourself. It could've been you who wished you had never did.

Whatever it is, lesson learnt

I have moved :) thank you Fief :)

http://itsthedetailsinthefabric.tumblr.com/

Prevention REALLY is better than Cure

This saddens me. So much that I cried watching it.
And some people find this funny. I don't know how that's at all humanely possible.
What has happened to the responsibility of parents today? REALLY-what?
This obviously is not at all the fault of this naive,ignorant child who doesn't know how to tell right from wrong. This one mistake that his father made by allowing his 18 month old son to try smoking has stripped this poor child of many opportunities that might arise for him in the future, a possibility of a long life; this baby has been stripped of his purity.

Today I found out that a new born baby was left hanging on the fence of the primary school, SK Damansara Jaya just around the corner of my house. Supposedly this was the act of a young teenage mother who couldn't deal with the responsibility that was now thrown on her as a result of a mistake she herself made.

The guard who parols around the neighbourhood found this new born soul.. dead.

Today was a truly insightful day. Filled with.. mixed feelings.
For some reason, the topic of conversation today revolved around future plans and things that are to come in the future, our NEAR future.
Needless to say that it is just a blink away. I don't know if that excites me.. or scares me. Not because I don't know what I want to do career wise or where I'm headed but the thought of starting anew and ending old routines and habbits makes me a tad bit nervous, just like the rest of the 17 year olds today, I'm sure.

Although I don't attend school very often, I am surprised to say this myself, but I am actually grateful for the ups and downs that I have had in DJ. Eventhough some of the downs I had are things I wish I could erase completely, but as all other trials and tribulations, they have only made me stronger, or so I hope. My 10 school years, 5 of which spent in DJ have been so different from year to year. I have made many different friends, and lost some on the way too but I still believe that everything happens for a reason. I think these past 2 years have been my transition years. I felt like I had to change and to change my surroundings in order to better myself. Some might agree, some might disagree but at that point in my life, during the final months of my Form 3 year, I had to. For the sake of my family, for the sake of my dignity and for the sake of my personal progress. I was clearly at my lowest of lows during my 15th year. I didn't really disclose my true feelings and showed what I really was going through to many people in my life at that time because to be quite honest, I was ashamed. So I branched out a little from my current group of friends, no not because I didn't think they were good people but just because I needed to start fresh and get my head straight again. To some, I could have done it even with the same surroundings but I at the time, I just desperately needed a new environment to help me find clearly what my priorities should be.

The one thing I realised today that has the most reason as to why I choose to put importance to good influence and surroundings is, my baby sister. I can't just live life carelessly, trying to make the most of my youth the way many other youth do today-not referring to all youth.
I, now, have to live my life trying my best to be an example to her, hoping and praying that she doesn't make the same mistakes that I did.

Everyday, I remind myself how lucky I am and how appreciative I am for the things that have happened in my life. And for the people that have come in and out of my life and the events that have taken place in my 17 years of living, good and bad, I am grateful for every,single,thing. Because without it all, I most definitely would not be who I am today.

I haven't been here in so long. Been so busy!

Today, I skipped school to work on what to present at my interview to hopefully be chosen as one of the 24 PJ Child Councillors. So nervous, but this excites me. I'm so proud of PJ because we are the FIRST city in Malaysia to hold the Children's Forum that MBPJ organised in June last year. We are also the first city to launch the on going goal to become A Child Friendly City and believe me, it's not just about the cleanliness and protection of the children of the city, it goes way beyond this. We are also the first ever city in Malaysia to have a Child Council.

How exciting is that?!

I told myself last year, that I will not let opportunities like this pass me by.

So, I attended the Children's Forum and to be honest, the first one was a little more for the young kiddies. But we,older youth brought this up to MBPJ and suggested to have another forum where it's focus could be more on hearing what we have to say, our suggestions and opinions, and to have consultation among the youths and adults. This one, worked out really well. The idea of a Child Council came from the youth at this very same forum.
And true enough, it's really happening.

I love the fact that I really am seeing the changes and growth in this city. These changes might not be as drastic as I or you would like it to be, but we have to start somewhere. The whole point of sustainable development is to have longevity, to sustain itself throughout the years. And that requires small and steady steps of growth.
In my opinion, we ARE heading in that direction and that's what's important.

--I'm keeping my fingers crossed for this Saturday :)

Naw Ruz '10

Naw Ruz

This year was by far THE best Naw Ruz i have ever experienced. I cannot remember a time where the community was as high spirited as this. Everyone was so happy, I speak for myself as well ofcourse. This year's fasting month and Naw Ruz was a good one, the best to me. God willing the rest of the year will be as happy, joyful and enlightening as this.

KING YANG. Foxy Mama ;) HAHA

I will remember this till the day I die, I WILL :')

Happy Naw Ruz everyone! <3

Have a great year ahead. Allah-u-abha :)

In the end, I want to be standing at the beginning with you.

Spending the evening reminiscing on my favourite childhood times : singing to good old Disney soundtracks.

What more can I ask for :)